I’m Positively G-Phoric

As I write this, G-Phoria 2006 is less than four hours away, and I couldn’t be more excited! Well, actually, I probably couldn’t be much less excited. Actually actually, I have no basis for which to be excited or not. I’ve never actually watched a G-Phoria show, but the Spike TV Video Game Awards have single-handedly soured me on the entire idea of basic cable video game shows. I’ll try not to let this unduly prejudice me as I watch tonight’s proceedings and blog them, live, right here! BE THERE!

While I’m on G-Phoria, is anyone else kind of perplexed by the “America’s Vote” theme that G4 has put together to promote the show. For one thing, it’s a midterm election year, so most American’s probably don’t even know that there’s an election going on this November. For another, the branding has forced some hapless copy-writer to craft “campaign messages” for every game nominated on the G-Phoria site. They range from the surreal:

Vote Madden, a Vote as Natural as Breathing.

Amped 3 is Like Turning the British Away at Bunker Hill… Extreme!

Tony Hawk Rules the World of Skateboarding the Way FDR ruled the United States for 16 years as president.

Hunt! Just like your rights dictate you must!

… to disquietingly political:

Fear is the ethic on which the USA made itself great. Fear allows you to celebrate that greatness by killing evil monsters.

Just as America rules through fear, Fear rules through its use of fantastic graphics and a sense of disquiet that will move you to kill.

Endorse the military, and all they stand for, by voting for Ghost Recon: Advanced Warfighter.

Study another empire, besides the one you live in, while voting for Age of Empires III.

… with little in between. Here’s hoping the actual show drops this hokey setup.

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